I know this is bold to ask, but could I ask your help, everyone, to improve my real life ?

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By Oliver (AKA the Admin) on 106 comments
in Categories: Just Talking
Tags: paizuri

I think you may have noticed it *cough*icomplainaboutitallthetime*cough*, one of my life’s regrets is that I’m still, to this day, a titfuck virgin. This isn’t my wife’s fault if her breasts are of “normal” size, not allowing the practice I’ve been dreaming of for years, of course ^^

What I had not imagined was that she was actually well aware of this “need” of mine (I thought I was hiding it well, in order not to hurt her), and she had started thinking of getting a breast enlargement for a while, now. She wants to spice up her appearance, she said. And she also read my hentairules blog more frequently than I thought, and thought titfucking looked worth practicing :shock: :german: :twisted:

Well, simply, she told me yesterday that she had decided to go on and get her breast augmentation from a local clinic.
Me : OH YEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH ! :D :woot:

However, the thing is, this is quite expensive, and that would cut a large part of our savings.
We have chosen a reputed, trusted and reliable clinic near the town we live, the total cost would be 4750 €, with an offered 500€ ambulatory fees discount, as seen on their prices page.

Soooo… I’ve been wondering…
Would you, dear visitors, accept to help me a little bit, with a donation ?
As things are, we won’t pay for the breast augmentation, even though we could pay it with our savings, we would be left with too little money in case shit happens and we have other problems. Every donated dollar or euro matters, really !
If, with donations, we can cover even a third of that cost, that will be enough and we’ll proceed to doing it, making me the happiest Oliver on Earth, and making my wife more satisfied, more proud of her body :)

 

 

 

 

Thank you VERY MUCH if you can help, really, thank you ! ^_^

*

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UPDATE, one day later :

 

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Farfignootan
Farfignootan
10 years ago

Normally I'm all for helping a fellow improve his sex life, but augmenting breast disgust me.

chimminey
chimminey
10 years ago
Reply to  Farfignootan

You'd understand if you actually had a penis.

Farfignootan
Farfignootan
10 years ago
Reply to  chimminey

You're right. If I had a penis I'd understand.
I'm so happy your wisdom has brightened the way for to understand the wonders of reaching orgasm through silicone.
Funny seeing as the only way you reach orgasm is through silicon.

Oliver AKA The Admin
Admin
10 years ago
Reply to  Farfignootan

Don't look down on tengas and fleshlights making live bearable for countless single men ;)

Fern
Fern
10 years ago
Reply to  chimminey

What a dick…

Anonymous
Anonymous
10 years ago
Reply to  Farfignootan

LOL, not everybody would approve of breast augmentation. You don't need a penis to form that kind of opinion.

TJCID
TJCID
10 years ago
Reply to  Farfignootan

I'm with Farfignootan on this one. I'm a guy and I'm against breast implantation, and I have heard of the occasional mishap. Sticking silicone under your flesh is nether natural nor healty.

Lupin the V
Lupin the V
10 years ago

same here, why don't just your wife's buttcheaks and pretend they're breasts?

Jankull
Jankull
10 years ago

C'est le poisson le plus dérangeant que j'ai jamais vu. ;)

redvodka69
redvodka69
10 years ago

We'll donate if you show us pics afterwards.

John smith
John smith
10 years ago

why request on April?

plop
plop
10 years ago

what day are we?

Kokolasticot
Kokolasticot
10 years ago

Is he making it for us or for his wife ?

DrtyBird
DrtyBird
10 years ago

Thanks for the chuckle! But It's still March 31st in America, so joke's on you!

Oliver AKA The Admin
Admin
10 years ago
Reply to  DrtyBird

Come on man, don't be too "my ass-centric", why should I stick to American, French or Polynesia hour ? No reason in any case to pick one over the other ;)

DrtyBird
DrtyBird
10 years ago

No worries. Also it seems that ShindoL/Dahootch took a page out of your book for his joke this year. http://dahootch.com/

anonally
anonally
10 years ago
Reply to  DrtyBird

i clicked the link and i can't view an FBI thing popped up TT~TT

ash
ash
10 years ago
Reply to  DrtyBird

What is that image from???

furupawa
furupawa
10 years ago
Reply to  DrtyBird

could someone tell me where is that image from ?

Oliver AKA The Admin
Admin
10 years ago
Reply to  DrtyBird

I did better, mine had customized offences and logo :D

Anon
Anon
10 years ago
Reply to  DrtyBird

Yeah, Oliver is being a really "chucklefuck" about this.

John Smith
John Smith
10 years ago

Oliver,

I highly recommend against this. Big and plastic is not remotely as good as real. It will be a burden on your wife. If you do love i.e. (I’m guessing since you married her), talk her out of it. It’s March 31st, so I’m guessing this isn’t April Fools. The physical and psychological burden of this can be quite detrimental to relationship and health.

Anony-mouse
Anony-mouse
10 years ago
Reply to  John Smith

It's April 1 where he is. LOL Oliver.:p

PussyLover
PussyLover
10 years ago

I won't donate. As my insurance agent used to say "Aesthetic procedures are not covered." It has to come out of your "out-of-pocket." And I wouldn't recommend your wife to go through this. She's just fine the way she is. Sorry man. :D

Lemonader
Lemonader
10 years ago

This post futhers my suspicion that Oliver is just a virgin with a daki waifu that he calls his wife. It's all just a made up story in his head.

Oliver AKA The Admin
Admin
10 years ago
Reply to  Lemonader

Yeah, and my 3 kids come from a little fairy who dropped them off my door :D

sancho
10 years ago

so, is it a joke or not? cause i really feel sorry for your not tit fucked little fella LOL

i just loved the fbi joke though

Wazzaby
Wazzaby
10 years ago

reading the blog see this (WTF?!?! o.0)

then remember the date….

ALMOST fell for it :P

Fern
Fern
10 years ago
Reply to  Wazzaby

What year was it that he announced he had to close the site due to financial reasons? Many ;_;s were had until the next day

Oliver AKA The Admin
Admin
10 years ago
Reply to  Fern

Nope, that one was my first april's fools joke, I think…
(It would be easy to check, hentairules.net/year/month )

juvil01
juvil01
10 years ago

i would donate if i have paypal!

kain_o_insano
kain_o_insano
10 years ago

GODDAMMIT THIS IS THE SECOND TIME TODAY!!!
I think I just learned something today: I am too gullible for my own good…

ps.: dammit saying this two times in a row is kinda humiliating, but i'm not a sore loser so ggwp

Ichtelt
Ichtelt
10 years ago

Lol fell for it completly forgot the date and was a bit(lets admit it a LOT) surprised with this until i read the comment thx for the chukle.

xxxantar
xxxantar
10 years ago

wtf je passais souvent en face de cette clinic, je savais pas Oliver que tu étais du coté de lille, le pire c'est que je traine depuis un paquet de temps sur ce blog…
par hazard y aurait-il une communauté lilloise fan de hentai ?

Oliver AKA The Admin
Admin
10 years ago
Reply to  xxxantar

Hmmm, possible, mais j'en doute. A ce jour, je connais un seul autre visiteur qui est de Lille…

Ottavio
Ottavio
10 years ago

Sei un mito.

anon
anon
10 years ago

I actually fell for it, and then I read the comments.

I salute you, you glorious bastard!
(Emphasis on the bastard ;P)

Hectotane
Hectotane
10 years ago

I'd advise against forcing your wife to augment her breasts. I mean… How would you feel if she asked you to augment your ball? Or your dick? And it's a painful and humiliating exercise?

I mean… Your wife is cute, right? (Lucky you, you bastard.) Just get her to cosplay as a maid, nurse, nun, or anime character. It'll be all good as long as you get to slide your cock into her pussy and mouth (and ass if you're both adventurous) and shoot all of the contents in your balls into her.

FFighter
FFighter
10 years ago

Hahaha, this was funny, but you've done better Oliver. Last year's FBI one was your best IMO (was that last year?).

On a side note, does paying for a titfuck count as cheating?

Oliver AKA The Admin
Admin
10 years ago
Reply to  FFighter

"On a side note, does paying for a titfuck count as cheating? "

Hmm… I wonder. I should try, to test if it counts or not :D
(just kidding, guys, don't ride your high horses okay ^^)

trololol
trololol
10 years ago

So what are you going to do with all the money you con people out of?

Oliver AKA The Admin
Admin
10 years ago
Reply to  trololol

Getting a penis enlargement surgery instead, of course, MWAHAHAHAHAAAAA !

Man Le
Man Le
10 years ago

All this people talk but no ACTION. Donate or NOT why the F do you people care so much. $10 send already good luck do what ever make your wife happy man.

Oliver AKA The Admin
Admin
10 years ago
Reply to  Man Le

So that was you. I'm grateful for the kind attention, it was nice of you, and I hope you won't resent being prank'ed :)

Farfignootan
Farfignootan
10 years ago

I took the bait. You got me. April Fools always sneaks up on me. Even still, should your wife ever consider it surgical augmentation, remind her that she's already hella beautiful.

Singsilipyan
Singsilipyan
10 years ago

French humor escapes me

Oliver AKA The Admin
Admin
10 years ago
Reply to  Singsilipyan

Run faster, then.

Chronos
Chronos
10 years ago

Count your loses Oliver, it’s not worth the money. In this recession (Ik you live in the UK but I doubt they’re hanging financial issues too) it’s best that you keep the money

RedProtoman
RedProtoman
10 years ago

i was actually about to donate at least 20$ till i got paid in a few days and decided to check the comments, lol had me for a moment xD

Oliver AKA The Admin
Admin
10 years ago
Reply to  RedProtoman

Well, I'm grateful for the intention ^^

Xenor
Xenor
10 years ago

Does your wife even know about the blog?

You have to update every 10 years once you get +2's installed. So, prepare to take your kid's college fund too…

Sorry you couldn't do this in reality…

Oliver AKA The Admin
Admin
10 years ago
Reply to  Xenor

Your line " So, prepare to take your kid's college fund too.." was HYPER spooky, and yet highly important. I'm sure lots of people getting breasts implants don't consider the long term impact O_o

Jasta85
Jasta85
10 years ago

lol Oliver, you got me there for a second.

Although in all seriousness, I would recommend against any type of breast augmentation. The breasts get awful stretch marks later in life that have to be constantly "tucked away" with more surgery or else it looks like the woman has a giant scrotum on her chest.

idontremembermyname
idontremembermyname
10 years ago

LOL, fell for it too, was a bit shocked and confused and all :-) Well done Oliver ! Bien joué !

donthaveaname
donthaveaname
10 years ago

Lol Oliver! Almost got me there!

numbAss
10 years ago

I'm with John Smith. Either way true or not, I advise you both to keep increasing mutual love…

… and keep practice monemone!!

acchi-kocchi vol.2 cha.20 ( http://z.mfcdn.net/store/manga/7364/02-020.0/comp… )

Hezard
Hezard
10 years ago

Nice try Oliver but you did not fool me this year, for I have grown wise to your wickeed machinations on this infamous day of all days. B)

Anonymous
Anonymous
10 years ago

You should have asked for penis enlargement too :P

HurpDurp
HurpDurp
10 years ago
Reply to  Anonymous

I'd donate to that.

Oliver AKA The Admin
Admin
10 years ago
Reply to  Anonymous

That was 2014's april's fools joke, YOU BASTARD YOU RUINED IT !

Wiseman
Wiseman
10 years ago

Drôle et dérangeant comme poisson d’avril…

Oliver AKA The Admin
Admin
10 years ago
Reply to  Wiseman

Merci :)

Big Boobies Yay
Big Boobies Yay
10 years ago

Unfortunately it ain't April 1st for me yet where i live, at the time i'm writing this, but a good chuckle i had as i read the comments. Good one.

That guy
That guy
10 years ago

She decided to spice up her appearance out of the blue, eh? Sooo, how long has your wife been cheating on you?

Oliver AKA The Admin
Admin
10 years ago
Reply to  That guy

You have a stingy tongue, sir.

Hentai Addict
Hentai Addict
10 years ago

Sorry to hear about your inexperience with paizuri. I'm happily married to a woman who is rather well endowed (42Ds). Not the biggest pair, but plenty enough to tit-fuck… which she's kind enough to let me do frequently. Seriously, paizuri is awesome. I'd rate it as slightly better than a blowjob.

That said, I'm not sending any $ for 3 reasons. 1- I'm a cheap bastard. 2- It is April 1st, so this might be an April Fools Joke 3- I'm a very very cheap bastard.

If you really really want to feel your cock sliding in and out, between the soft, supple and slippery melons… you can try 1 of 3 things. 1- Pony up the dough and get the procedure done 2- Do what you can with what she already has 3- Find a well endowed women to have affair with (strongly recommend against option 3).

Or maybe you can try to construct and titty-fuck masturbatory aid? Water balloons, astroglide, and some clever holding?

Yue
Yue
10 years ago

Happy April Fool.

Eomi
Eomi
10 years ago

You got me good oliver, it has only been april 1 for a few hours and you already got me. touchee sir.

S.C.
S.C.
10 years ago

Right, today is the 1st april. I keep forgetting that.

Anonymous
Anonymous
10 years ago

The donate button doesn't seem to be working.

Oliver AKA The Admin
Admin
10 years ago
Reply to  Anonymous

Yep, that's the thin line between a good prank and an actual shameless attempt at scamming money ;)

roadkill
roadkill
10 years ago

Yeah! Wth Oliver!? :D

bebek
bebek
10 years ago

well..i think maybe you should accept your wife in her condition.
and more better ur wife did’t implant or anything to make her breast bigger or something

just try and learn accept who u are..God give u the best u know..

GBU

Dis077
Dis077
10 years ago

short answer: no

Long answer: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO*takes deep breath*OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Feanor
Feanor
10 years ago

Eveyone knows oliver loves a good aprils fool prank. But the issue is not all that funny, actually, which you can tell from the comments. I say to each his own. Personally I pretty much hate implants. I don't hate big breasts per se, but I do tend to lean more towards smaller ones. And even if they are bigger (like large c-cup or d-cup), that is okay, as long as it fits the womens body. Can't have a slender and petite woman with double d breasts. That never looks good.

But implants, I really hate. Mostly because of the porn biz. I've seen so many beauties. But it seems as soon as their bodies change (you won't always have the digestion of a 18 year old), and they gain some weight, it seems the first move to make is getting implants. Probably because breasts don't really get fatter, unlike the rest of the body. So getting bigger breasts let's you appear a bit slimmer than you are, or at least let's you look proportional. There are countless examples of beauties that ruined their bodies with implants. At least in my humble opinion.
But like I said, to each his/her own.

As long as they enjoy it, that is all there is to it. But I'd never pay for someone elses sexlife. I wonder though, if oliver spent a second thinking of me when writing this, since I occasionally critize him over money (seeing as I don't read all the comments here, I don't know how many other people do, so….).

Afterman
Afterman
10 years ago

Ive been fooled once today and it reminded me of that stunt you pulled last year so nice try Oli

Oliver AKA The Admin
Admin
10 years ago
Reply to  Afterman

Sadly, that's the kind of joke you can only pull off once in a lifetime ^^

Tomcat
Tomcat
10 years ago

Dammit, had to read halfway down the comments before it clicked. Oh, le April Fools…

Umbal
Umbal
10 years ago

My reaction:
"Huh?!" …
"Seriously!"…
"Waaaait a second"
*checking date*
"Bwahaha… You bastard!! "

Umbal
Umbal
10 years ago
Reply to  Umbal

Btw Most of the time i`m against implants because I think the problem is that they use implants too big (!!) or that the surgeon does a bad job.

for example (porn stars):
good job: India, Zeina Heart
bad job: Amia Miley, …countless others…

Passing through
Passing through
10 years ago

Happy April Fools
damn, at first I thought whaaaat?
this is ridiculous even by Oliver's standard but then I notice the date O_o